My Worst Nightmare

Every day that my son goes to school I wait for the phone call.  If you have a special needs kid you know the call that I mean.  I have had the many horrible calls from the school that make my heart literally stop.  He has hit other kids, flipped over desks, and screamed profanities.  If you don’t understand him and his disorder you may think he is being aggressive.  NO! he is scared, overwhelmed and can’t figure out what to do so he explodes.  He doesn’t mean it and when it is all over he will sob for hours.  It is heart wrenching to me because I know he doesn’t mean it and I know he is really trying.

The drive from my work to the school seems more like 10 hours instead of 10 minutes when they call.  My heart and mind races.  What will I walk in on?  Will I be able to console him?  Will they have made it worse?  Did he hurt anyone?  Last year I nearly had a heart attack when I pulled in and a cop car was there.  No it can’t be for him they told me he was sick but maybe he had a meltdown because he was sick.  I walk into the office and the secretary tells the cops “His mom is here”  WHAT? Oh my God the shear panic I had in that moment.  I ask what happen and the cop starts telling me how he walked by his classroom and he was pulling his hair.  Me- Okay he had a headache that’s what he does.  Cop- I thought it was strange so I asked him to come out and he came right out and followed me down.  Me- I think I am missing something here.  Cop- Oh I was just here on a regular patrol and just happened to notice him, he isn’t in trouble.  Me- I don’t know whether to be relieved or b*tchslap the cop.

For someone else the nightmare came true.  I pray for this child and their parents.  Words really can’t express how my heart goes out to them.  This could be me.

Thank you Carly for sharing the link to story on twitter.  She is amazing by the way- check her out

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