Co-workers really awesome for Special Needs Mom!

On the bright side, my co-workers are awesome.  He woke up this morning and was agitated about going to school.  I gave him time, I tried to bribe him, I threatened, but no matter what I did he refused to go.

He asked me if he could go to work with me.  I asked why he would want to go to work with me and he said it is boring.  Why would you want to go somewhere boring?  He said “as punishment.”  I felt bad for him.

He seemed really depressed and it broke my heart.  He was again saying that he hates school.  I had no idea what to do so I decided to take him to work with me.  I figured that if I got him out of the house maybe I could convince him to go to school.

I called in to various co-workers on my way in to review what work needed to be done and how I may need them to cover various projects or meetings.  No one questioned, they just offered to help in any way.  This is after they have received this type of call multiple times over the past couple of weeks.  When I have issues with him they all pitch in.  They are awesome.

By the time we arrived at my job I had to go to a meeting right away.  One of my co-workers got my coffee for me- THANK YOU!  Just about every time that I come in to work late someone gets me a coffee.  We are not talking about a plain coffee, I drink a pumpkin spice latte with soy.  I always pay them back but I appreciate they go out of their way for me.

I set my son up on my computer and I touched base with someone else in the office so they knew he was there.  When I came back from my meeting my son was in my office playing with a mini Mr. Potato Head.  I went to thank my co-worker who I suspected was behind his new toy.  She told me that she put him to work cleaning out her toys to throw away the broken ones.  She told me that he played with each of them and threw away the one that was broken.  I thought it was great that she gave him something to do.

After all of this I tried again to get him to go to school but he still said no.  He made a deal with the co worker that gave him a toy that he will return tomorrow.

I did touch base with the case manager and his psychologist to see what else might encourage him to return. We discussed working with him so he would not be overwhelmed with make up work.  The case manager said he has been working with him to keep him from getting overwhelmed and will continue to do so.

I think we have all of the bases covered so hopefully he will return tomorrow.


  1. You have great co-workers! I found you via Delightfully Different!

  2. Any chance that he just REALLY needs a change of school?
    When I was in Jr High, things were so bad at school, I missed more days than I attended (not an exaggeration). I was utterly miserable, depressed… it was awful.

    Moving to another school was scary (change!), but things had gotten so awful ta the old school, change was less scary than actually going to the same school.

    CANNOT tell you how much better things got for me at the new school. I was still “weird” and awkward, but people were so much nicer. I actually looked forward to going to school.

    • Thanks for stopping by & providing perspective. Believe me I am thinking about it. I did find a school over the summer that I think he would really like- it was mostly Asperger’s but also kids that have been bullied. He refuses to go, or to even go visit. We met today with the case manager to make more accommodations- going in late and no band. If he doesn’t go back or still says not good I will have to take him to the other school. Or find a different school. I really think they are trying to accommodate him. He seemed fine there until that damn day with the pep rally. I think if we get him back in it will be better, I am wondering if he is just so anxious thinking about that day he can’t think about going back yet.
      I don’t want to keep him home because I really think he needs the socialization.

  3. Sounds like you have great co-workers and a wonderfully supportive work environment! That’s always a blessing!

    I do feel for your son, though. Pretty much the same thing happened to me. I refused to go to school in the middle of my freshman year. Anxiety and social pressure just got to be too much. I never did return to school after that.

    • Quietcontemplation- was replying to celebration then saw yours. I know anxiety is issue for him but they have him in small group. I don’t know. Will have to see when/if he goes back. Or what other options we have. Thanks for providing ur perspective. Really appreciated.

  4. I know a lot of aspies would disagree with me, but I found that the more I stayed home the more agoraphobic I got. I am hoping you find something soon before (like you mentioned) his thoughts about anxiety trump the actual anxious experience itself. I actually read this post before your latest one. It does seem he is feeling quite similar to what I did at that time in life.

    Is he doing any behavior therapy? I have found Acceptance Behavior Therapy, and CBT to be of help in the way of anxiety and depression. If you’d like to chat more privately send me a DM or message me on Triberr and I’ll send you my e-mail or FB info.

  5. I just had to finally visit long enough to comment and found this post … isn’t it amazing when you stop and think about the folks who just seem to make life a little bit easier? And it’s even better that they are your co-workers and so awesome!

    I know I work from home … and couldn’t imagine trying to work outside the home any longer – but I have some of the most amazing clients. Supportive, encouraging, and there when I need them to be a friend before being a client! I know I’m really lucky that way and I’m so glad that you are as well!


    ps – find me on FB and let’s chat sometime – I have a friend who has an adult with newly-diagnosed Aspergers and I would love to try and connect you guys!

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