Sorry for the long pause…. It has been a crazy year!! But so many good things have come out of it!!
So he turns 18 in about 6 months (he of course corrects me & tells me the exact timeframe- LOL) but anyways it was time to take care of some things.
We had to start the assessments for disability. Or transition services or whatever works best for him. So side note – I contacted the local board of DD and they would not assess him, open a file or ANYTHING until I had his diagnosis changed to Autism. What a crock of shit. Well I guess it really isn’t a side note because that first evaluation with the psychologist is part of his story and breakthrough.
The last time he saw the psychologist it didn’t go well. He shut down & she kept pushing and then treated me like crap for excusing him. He left room and then she lectured me on what was best for him and how I can’t excuse him from therapy, yada yada. That was 2 plus years ago. I have worked with my son the way I wanted to. The way I needed to. Some of it was affected by my illness. Some was affected by my business – he has blossomed into an amazing assistant. But the end result is he is doing awesome. He sat and talked to her about transition planning. He was so proud to tell her he is my assistant which just melted my heart. He really has made a lot of progress – emotionally and wow, just everything. And it felt good to hear from an “expert” about how amazed she was by his progress. None of which happened through any “experts”. He was home with us and allowed to work within his comfort zone. And he thrived!!
Between the psychologist and the Board of DD they talked to him a lot about independent living skills. After this he has had a renewed interest in learning about self care and helping with housework. I have no words for how wonderful this is. There is no arguing in fact he approaches me. Or like the other day I said I had to do dishes he just came over and kind of shrugged his shoulders – nervous = nonverbal – so I talked him through what to do. Half way through he said “enough for now” and walked away. Ok by me!!
I feel absolutely blessed by everything that had happened this year. Being laid off & spending time with him helped a lot. Having an actual job I could offer him has been priceless. And my business had another bonus. Before he always said no he didn’t want to have anything with his name on it. But since he is now part of the business he accepted his new clarinet case with a name on it (did I mention he is back to playing!! And going to his lessons – his request!!!)
Along the way we had put in a bookshelf and put his name on a cube. It has worked well because he knows where his stuff belongs!! The cube system is Ikea and the cube is Thirty One (what business he is an assistant for)
And then I had the bright idea to put his laundry in a large utility tote with his name. I told my husband he would then be sure what is his. And guess what he did last night! He brought down his dirty clothes in it without being asked to even pick up his clothes let alone bring them to the laundry room!!! OMG yay!